The Revolving Door

By CBM National intern, Jordan Mancari – 


Do you ever feel like you’re going through a revolving door? For me that’s my life most of the time. Here recently, I’ve seen God consistently opening doors I’ve tried to close, such as teaching and leading worship. It came to the point that I told myself God didn’t want me to do anything as far as teaching goes. Well, the more I tried to close that door, the more I saw God swing it right back open. It wasn’t necessarily that I wanted the door closed, it was that I was afraid. 1 John 4:18 (ESV) says, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.” It wasn’t until my first time teaching at Church of the Cove (the amazing church in Townsend, TN where we get to serve during our first four months as interns) that I instantly knew God wanted this door open. I saw Him take me and allow me to be able to minister to the youth there; it was a very humbling experience. Like the verse says, “there is no fear in love.” When I began seeing the love the children had for learning Gods Word, that’s when my fear of teaching began fading away and I started to realize why God was opening this door I had tried so hard to force closed.

Likewise, with leading worship, I had also convinced myself it was no longer something God wanted me to do. I had been given many opportunities to lead worship; for instance, I played guitar for a year in the Cru (Campus Crusade for Christ) band. After that year, I felt like God was telling me it wasn’t what He wanted for me, when really I was the one who was closing the door. Once I became a CBM National Intern, I began to see God reopen that door, but I was still constantly trying to slam it closed. Then I realized something! God has given me the talent to begin with, and if leading worship was something He wanted me to do, then that’s what I needed to do. Then, I was asked to lead worship at Church of the Cove’s youth group on Wednesdays, and God has surely blessed me through it by allowing me to see the youth there truly worshipping Him in songs of praise. Psalm 98:4 says, “Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth; break forth into joyous song and sing praises.” It’s the very moment that I began to see the youth making a joyful noise to the Lord in songs of praises that I began to realize why He wants this door to remain open.

In closing, I’ve come to the realization that sometimes the doors we try to force closed are the ones God may want open, and vice versa. Revelation 3:8 (ESV) says, “I know your works. Behold, I have set before you an open door, which no one is able to shut. I know that you have but little power, and yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name.” It’s important that we realize that when it’s God who opens a door, no one is able to shut it. No matter how hard we may try to force the door(s) closed, He can always open them back up. Make sure your life doesn’t become a revolving door. Philippians 4:13 (ESV) says, “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” Even though the open door might not be an easy one to step through, with Christ we are given the strength to overcome all.

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